Spring on the Way!

Yesterday I took my first photos with the Sandia range backdrop in forever.  The Range is incredibly beautiful and inspiring.  It has been so f-ing cold I haven’t wanted to practice  asana out there!

“Heading to work.”

I guess it is not just being cold outside.  My practice is rather rusty. I love my job but at the end of the day I’m pooped!

I need to get on my mat far more than the time I’m currently devoting to it .  My asana is energizing.  I *know* I pep up and have increased clarity when I commit to it.  I hope with the return of spring that I will feel compelled to routinely practice.

 

 

On The Road Again

I am elated to say that I have been cleared by the optometrist to resume driving and inverting in yoga.  I’m almost equally glad about the two!  It was a super pain in ass and annoying to not drive since I live in the sticks.  And I couldn’t participate in a huge portion of poses when teaching and taking class.

So I am back on the road.  I found that it actually tired me out to do some errands after a kick ass yoga class.  I believe it it because it was definitely the most active day I’ve had in a month.  I ended up taking a super long nap in the afternoon. Or maybe it’s just getting old!

Some pix from the lovely Vivify studio.. It was a super challenging and fun class, but I realized that I have lost a LOT of strength in the past month of having to take it super easy…..So I have my work cut out for myself. The good things is that while I start to do my work search, I will have some time to get on my mat, hopefully on a daily basis!

 

It was CRAZY to see my depth perception tests from one month ago and two days ago.  Black means you can’t detect anything in that field.  Doc was really encouraged that my vision had improved as much as it had in a month.  Optic neuritis typically takes a long time to resolve, and the extent to which it does can be limited.  My fast recovery is a good indicator that I won’t have much permanent damage. My left eye vision is still pretty blurry.  Electronics screens are really difficult to read.  So I certainly hope for more

I miss inversions

I miss driving too.

Follow-up with my optometrist on Tuesday. Eager.  But what if he doesn’t think that my vision has improved enough to drive? I know it is getting better but also know that I read for shit with my left eye alone.  My overall left field of vision remains in general dimmer than the right, but I can make out a lot of details and peripheral vision is back online

A month of not driving has been hard. A month of fretting about my vision overall has been stressful.  One of my best stress relievers is my yoga mat, but I am really limitied in the poses that I can do without risk of increasing my ocular pressure which can interfere with the healing in optic neuritis.

I know I still have a charmed life. I have no idea the suffering others endure. And someday, no matter what, I won’t be driving.  But right now, having a bit of a pity party, even though I know I shouldn’t.  The heart does what it wants, right?  Despite what hte brain tells it.

Namaste and Blessings, T.

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It’s raining in Rio Rancho. Thank you Universe!

OMG we are getting precipitation here in the High Desert. It will make for a very messy walk with the Basenjis this morning, but boy do we need precipitation.  Yes!!!!

I had the unexpected surprise of sub teaching a couple of yoga classes this week. Hooray!!!!

It totally sucks that I lost my PTA job and income recently due to forces beyond my control.  But a definite sliver of the silver lining is I’m getting on my mat a whole lot more than I was while working in Santa Fe. I’m going to grab every chance I get to teach or take class while I figure out what I’m going to do with my life now.

I am incredibly grateful to be getting back on my mat.  My practice has always help me withstand the rollercoaster of life.

I feel like a broken record talking about this.  I’ll try and keep it short. I’ll try to figure out a way to stop even telling the tale.  I have faith that soon it will fall into the category of blip on the life map of bullshit.  I continue to recognize how good my life is.  Charmed really.

Anyways,

My life was pretty much up-ended last month when my left eye’s vision unexpectedly tanked within a 3 day span.  I honestly feared I was going blind with no warning.  Terrifying and truly life altering.  MRIs/Emergency Room/3 eye doc visits later….. all data consistent with optic neuritis of viral or idiopathic nature.  Not multiple sclerosis, which I now know to be a common cause of this condition. So I’m exceedingly grateful it isn’t MS.

I’m elated that my vision has improved quite a bit after that first wretched week.  My left eye vision still sucks – like I can’t read what I’m typing at all with my left eye.  There really isn’t a treatment for this illness, it is a lengthy “wait and see” what amount of vision that I will regain.   I must accept I will likely suffer some permanent vision loss so that still is scary. I don’t know what I’ll do if I don’t have doctor blessing to drive. I feel so fucking dependent to go places.  My husband has been a rock-star in terms of taking me places as well as keeping my spirits up.

I grudgingly thank the Universe for forcing me out of a toxic work situation in Santa Fe.  It is a fine clinic, and I sure wanted to remain there for a few years.  I knew I couldn’t sustain it for 10 years, but I sure wanted to work there for a few years. But The Universe recognized that it was still a toxic situation for me – mainly the f-ing rough daily commute.  The Force decided for me that it was simply no longer an option. It’s been a really good change for my home-life to be sure.  Tip of the Positive Iceberg Hit.  I still feel horrid that I had to stop working with no warning at all. I know my co-workers really had to scramble since I couldn’t be there.  I’m glad that they found someone to replace me and therefore to know I should let go of the guilt.  I’m still processing this all honestly.  Harlan and I are journeying up to SF later today to turn in my keys and grab things I’ve brought to the clinic.  Glad he will be there to buffer my emotions whilst being there.

It is time to stop discussing my vision loss scare.  I will scream to cyberspace glee when I’m allowed to drive and when I find a cool PTA job.  But no more re-telling/re-visitng my sob story.  Things are going to work out.

We’re finding time to do a lot of stuff around the house since I’m rather homebound. Another silver lining.  New office furniture and 2 bookshelves for my little yoga studio now tucked in a closet.  I am stowing things nearby but out of sight so I can practice in a serene space. I am a double Virgo and messiness really drives me crazy.

I also think that my relationships have truly improved now that I have more time and energy to give.  So that is pretty cool.

It totally stinks to not have a decent income!  I sure hope that I will quickly score a great outpatient orthopedic position that is geographically far more desirable.  I would LOVE to be able to incorporate a whole lot more of yoga instruction into how I treat patients and students.   Focusing on the proper dynamics of a given PT  exercise such as straight leg raises has been incredibly instructional and I’m glad I have been imparted with that knowledge.  Now I yearn for a situation where I can blend such an exercise into a functional activity based on the needs of a particular client.  1:1 instruction is awesome.  But I would prefer to focus on Therapeutic Exercise with a whole lot less emphasis on singular exercises and the use of modalities such as ultrasound.  It is undeniably debatable whether modalities are beneficial in Physical Therapy.  I truly believe in my heart I’m meant to treat patients with yoga versus electricity.  Just saying.

Again changing the subject.  Here are some pictures taken yesterday at Vivify. I thought yoga pants with full of roses would be perfect for a Valentine’s Day Yoga class.  The anatomical interpretation of our lower extremities is more than debatable, but I still love these pants.

I haven’t been inspired to do much photography during my illness. Until this week I was supposed to keep activity to a minimum. But now I’m cleared to get sweaty and work my body.  Hooray!  I am sure I’ll be getting back to pictures as well.

Hasta la vista baby, it is time for me to ROCK and ROLL for the day.  Dropping off my keys and saying goodbye to people at TS is going to be difficult! But that will close a chapter and who know what now lies ahead!!!

 

 

 

One of my favorite yoga postures – Wheel Pose/Urdhva dhanurasana

I taught 3 yoga classes back to back yesterday. I  really had a lot of fun doing so. Especially as they were all different styles – Hot/Sweaty, Gentle Foundational and Yin.  I got to see so many of my tribe.  I met some new and cool people. I’m so grateful to teach at Vivify.  I was extremely exhausted afterwards, but in a really good way.

Teaching Yin again today at 4 p.m.  Really looking forward to it  🙂

 

I am also grateful to be working at Therapy Solutions in NM.  The commute to Santa Fe is a little long, but it is a gorgeous drive and it is cool to get to know more about Santa Fe.  I have much sight-seeing I want to do, but in good time. I’ve got a lot going on, and after work, I’m pretty tired after work, it is a super busy place and I feel like such a newbie it bums me out!  But I’ll get the hang of things and I love how Physical Therapy and my Yoga practice is fusing into where I want my career to go. I want to work with people of all ages, and help them to rehabilitate and hopefully catch the yoga bug.  Getting to know more about rehab makes me a much better yoga teacher.  I love where this is going in my life.

There is a rest area near Santa Fe that I have “had” to stop at en route to work. The sun is just rising over the mountain range and I’ve been cooped up in a car.  So of course I’m using this incredible backdrop for some yoga photography 🙂

 

Weary

They are kinda dragging us thru the mud at school right now. I am staying afloat, but I am getting so tired and today I have my last 2 skill competency tests and GOOD GOLLY they stress me out. I know my stuff, but in a phony situation with an instructor holding a clipboard, checking off whether I perform/say given words, it totally destroys my soul.  I feel quite competent in a real in environment, but these tests….they are a test to a person that beats herself up.

I’ve set up my screensaver to rotate through my pictures  Here is todays. I think the Universe is reminding me that however difficult going back to school has been, I don’t have to be a microbiologist anymore.

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I am so glad to be freed of those days.  So I’m gonna try and suck up this last little bit – graduation in mid April – which involves 7 weeks in my beloved old stomping grounds of Seattle…. I’m about to embark on an exciting journey if I just hang in there a little while longer.

2 week countdown

I head to Sunport (ABQ airport) 2 weeks from today, Seattle being my destination for 7 whole weeks.  I’m so excited and yet stressed beyond belief!  The next 2 weeks are going to be really trying. Between final testing until next Friday… and getting my ducks in a row for such a long trip is…. overwhelming….

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I’ll deal, I always do.. 🙂

The next thing I know I’ll be HOME, if but for a teensy bit of time.  It will bittersweet though, for my life has pretty much transitioned to NM. It’s been nearly 2 years we’ve been here and I’m part of a fabulous kula.  So I’ll be homesick for my husband, minions, (Romeo and Zena) and NM family.

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I won’t be staying in a drafty hotel room.  I loved Gallup externship, but the hotel above was most depresssing.

It’s going to be interesting to working with elderly people. I tend to get along with them well.  Their stories are pretty amazing if nothing else.  It will be fun to help them regain as much as former function as possible.  🙂